Let’s talk about sex baby! You remember the popular 90’s song by rap group Salt-N-Pepper that everyone used to jam too? That song was a hit but also had major backlash from the media and many parents because they felt the song was advertising sex but now these days you can not turn on the television or radio without hearing about sex.
As a parent this three-letter word (Sex) is probably one subject you dread talking about with your child(ren). Yet, in the world we live in with music, reality TV shows and the growth of social media, it’s hard to hide or shield the youth from it. So, this is the time when it’s very important to have the Birds and the Bees talk, so your child will get the facts and not find out the wrong information from outside resources.
I know this is something that you may not want to read but the earlier you can talk to your child about sex, the better. According to Thinkingprogress.org children are starting to have sex as early as the age of 13. Therefore, even if you don’t think your child would have sexual intercourse at that age, it’s still important that they have the correct information about it.
Here are some tips when approaching your child(ren) about the Bird and Bees.
First, establish the best way to approach this conversation. Each child is different and learns differently. Decide if you want to just have a conversation, show educational videos, or give them pamphlets/printed out documents on the information.
If you are in a two-parent household decide which parent is the best to have this talk or it could be that both of you would like to do it as a family. The reason being is because sometimes, boys feel more comfortable talking exclusively to a male and sometimes females feel more comfortable with a woman. Yet if you are a single parent than you must make this talk as smooth as possible.
Next is to get into a comfortable environment that will be best for both parties, whether it’s in the living room playing a game, over dinner or just a simple walk in the park.
Another step is to find out what your child knows, this is an opportunity to see what information your child has accumulated at their age whether you need to just cover the basics or go into deeper levels about this issue.
After knowing their knowledge level, let them know the good, the bad and the ugly about sex. Give them all the details and options that they have. From Birth Control, condoms, being abstinence, pregnancy, health risk, to emotional baggage and the negative consequences of choices that can be made. Cover all the information so they will not be blind-sided by anything. I know there are parents who sometimes want to omit information because they feel like the more you tell a child the more chances they will go out and try to have sex but honesty is the best formula.
Also try not to scare your kids half to death about sex because using the scare tactics does not work for most children these days. There is no perfect way to have this conversation, but the best way is to present all the information and have faith that your child will make the right choices and remember you’re teaching them about making certain decisions when it comes to having sex.